Author: dannalundstrom

Soul Maintenance

- dannalundstrom

 

56e2c8e92920c82b2fe37d67d386387c

We are having a good number of windows replaced around our house the next few days.  As I am sitting here watching these guys rip away the old;  it occurred to me I am watching a picture of life.

These windows needed caulked and painted a long time ago, and because they were not, that lapse of care allowed for environmental elements to compromise not only the windows, but their surrounding support structures, too.  The more they take out; the more decomposition years of neglect exposes.

Disregard transitions the process of restoration from superficial to deep rooted.

I am a lot like those windows.  Whether it be my health, my relationships, nourishment of my soul…neglect creates a threshold for degeneration in all those realms.  Once rot sets in, over time it runs deeper and deeper through those areas,  just like my windows.I can unknowingly arrive at a place of deep disintegration simply from a failure to consistently maintain.

The demands of life can keep me distracted and busy.  It becomes easy to disregard soul maintenance above all things.  When I become negligent in my time spent with The Lord, unwanted impostures take root in my heart.  You may know some of them? Anxiety, worry, and fear are a few of the familiar ones.

My mind and heart require daily nourishment and cleansing to protected me from destructive paths.  Proverbs 4:23 illustrates this so beautifully ~Above all else, guard your heart, for everything you do flows from it.  Part of guarding my heart requires consistent, fruitful nourishment.  It is not an efficient process, but it is highly effective.

When I neglect my spiritual well being, days become exhausting.  Life is already difficult. It is essential to be intentional so that I may weather storms without the threat of deep-rooted destruction.

Oh How He Loves Us

- dannalundstrom

I picked up my Bible this morning feeling weary.  World events, daily challenges, people I love that are hurting; it all takes a toll.  I asked God before opening his word, to let my eyes fall on what I needed to see this morning.  Also, that He would equip me with the grace to not just see, but to understand and subsequently live.

With one providentially designed flip of my Bible, my eyes landed on 2 Corinthians 4:10~ Through suffering, our bodies continue to share in the death of Jesus so that the life of Jesus may also be seen in our bodies.

Wow, I love that! It is in no other place than our suffering that the glory, power, faithfulness and love of Jesus can be illuminated so profoundly and with such clarity.  This may sound counterintuitive to you, but I find honor in the fact that we have the opportunity through or tribulations to reflect the image of Jesus to others.

His reflection does not mean pasting on a fake smile every day, and saying God is in control.  It does not mean we say to our friends, “I’m doing fine;” when that is not the case.  Sometimes it means remembering life is hard, and I am human, but I have hope in a Savior who shares in my struggles. He collects every tear and gently stores them in a bottle.   He sees scars inside us that only are visible to Him, and soothes them with a balm that He singularly possesses.

Living as I say I believe means remembering that although God may appear quiet at times, I trust His understanding, not mine. God answers every prayer the moment we voice them with one of three answers; yes, no or wait.  Remembering that and being open to His wisdom, and not bound to my expectations is an ingredient to peace.

Life may lead us down many dirt roads, but with Jesus we never travel those dusty roads alone.  It is on those very paths He reveals Himself to us, and our faith and trust in Him become stronger and real.
Oh, how He loves us!  His love is too deep for us to know easy all the time.  That would only give us a strong foothold in self-sufficiency.

He loves us enough that He wants us to seek and know him in an intimate relationship.  I would never arrive there if everything were always easy.  I don’t enjoy trials.  When my mind is redirected to their primary purpose, though; how can I not be grateful?

This life is not eternal.  It is just our prelude to Heaven.  It is our warm up, our training camp, our one and only run through before we enter Heaven’s gates.  If we are lucky; at some point in this life we authentically mature to a degree where our soul’s deepest desire is nothing this life can afford us.  Our deepest longing becomes to know a Savior with such a thirst that our hearts song is;  come Lord Jesus come so that I may see your face.  My journey is teaching me that we arrive at this destination through the experential character of a loving Father whose faithfulness and glory shine brightest through our darkest days.

A Gentle Whisper

- dannalundstrom
If you watch closely, His fingerprints are everywhere.
If you watch closely, His fingerprints are everywhere.

“Go out and stand before me on the mountain,” the Lord told him. And as Elijah stood there, the Lord passed by, and a mighty windstorm hit the mountain. It was such a terrible blast that the rocks were torn loose, but the Lord was not in the wind. After the wind there was an earthquake, but the Lord was not in the earthquake. And after the earthquake there was a fire, but the Lord was not in the fire. And after the fire there was the sound of a gentle whisper.~1 Kings 19:11-12.

I love this. It is a great reminder to me in all the answers I am seeking through prayer, to not get so consumed looking for God’s mighty handprints that I miss his pervasive fingerprints. He sometimes shows up in majestic ways, but in my striving to see, it can be easy to miss Him in the small, humble spaces all around.

Happy Saturday friends.

Hope in the Fire

- dannalundstrom

 

BurningBush610x351

And the angel of the LORD appeared to him in a flame of fire out of the midst of a bush. He looked, and behold, the bush was burning, yet it was not consumed.~Exodus 3:2
This is a beautiful illustration of the hope we all have in this life. When situations are searing our hearts, they do not have to saturate our souls. When circumstances are tough and trials are heavy; we may feel shaken, but we do not have to be shattered. Because the bush was burning, but not consumed, we can face the fires of our days with inextinguishable confidence and experience the beauty and affliction of the fire without forever being burned. ‪#‎preachingtoself‬

Turn Your Wait Into A Welcome

- dannalundstrom

acc04a409f16f50dc0ac4fb98615c9d7

If you are waiting for something today; a job, test results, a cure, relief from circumstances… There is an abiding gift available to all those who are anxiously scanning the horizon with expectation. Turn your waiting into a welcome to saturate deeper into the affection of a Savior, who longs to give rest to the weary. He is not ashamed by your frustrated impatience. It is the very thing that draws Him to you. Don’t wait alone. I wait for the LORD; my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope. ~Psalm 130:5

Fragmented Edges, Hopeful Hearts

- dannalundstrom

Carter had his first of three appointments with the vision doctor yesterday. We were there two hours; it felt like five. It was a long afternoon, and very taxing for him physically, and ultimately emotionally.

I think it is difficult in any situation to not form expectations in our heads. This holds true in happy scenarios and difficult ones. Our pictures, which are very often our own worst enemies, can be thieves of peace when they develop differently than how they looked from behind the lens of our vision.

I went into yesterday’s appointment knowing there were visual issues; I just didn’t realize the extent and multitude of them. It honestly felt like the air had been sucked out of my sails, as I was not prepared.

I know many of you moms know this and live this every day, when you hear a doctor tell your child something like, “I know you don’t much joy in your life right now, and it may be that way for a while,” that is heart breaking! Even harder, I am forty-two. I can reason and find gratitude amidst the grief. For a fifteen year old boy, that is an arduous task, further clouded by the effects of a head injury.

Sometime after we got home from Oregon, I found a white, small bag in my laundry room. I didn’t know what it was or where it came from. We had very little luggage, and I never saw it in Carter’s hospital room or in any of our bags. I have no idea how it got in my laundry room. When I opened it up, it smelled awful, and I immediately knew it was something that had been wet, and in that bag for a long time. Upon pulling it out, I felt my heart rise to the top of my throat, and sink with a hard painful plunge into the depths of my stomach.

It was the swimsuit Carter was wearing when his accident happened. It was shredded and frayed because it had been cut off his body. I cannot adequately describe the intense infusion of opposite emotions at that moment as I sunk to the cold, hard ground. It was like being pulled between intimidating agony and intense appreciation. I cried and then I rejoiced right there on the uninviting but accommodating laundry room floor.

My first thought was to throw that swimsuit away, but for a reason I then did not understand, I could not do it. I washed it, folded it and put it on my laundry room shelf. It is in a spot that I see it every time I go in that room, which is frequent. Now and then I pick it up and hold it close to me. Each time I do this, the frayed, rough edges that are image bearers of the sharp edges that grazed them catch my eye. I keep being drawn to their messy appearance that is a remnant of the trauma that ensued.

It occurred to me one day that those edges keep beckoning my attention because they represent something important. That battered swimsuit is a great representation of both tragedy and triumph. It makes me think of what Jesus’ robe must have looked like at the end of his journey which would also illustrate great despair, but not void of eternal hope.

Life is kind of like Carter’s fragmented swimsuit. Sometimes things cut us up, unravel our plans and leave us feeling weary and worn, but when we live in the shadows of a Savior, we are never without hope, and we are ensured an ultimate victory. That is great news that we continue to rest in daily!

We continue to covet your prayers for healing friends. I am grateful and encouraged by all of you. Thank you from the deepest places of my heart.

 

Inadequate and Unashamed

- dannalundstrom

Vulnerability, for me is one of the keys to living free. It is the willingness to say, I am broken and weak that opens a reservoir of strength we can only gain in our inadequacy.If we need not, we seek not. It is only in seeking we find.

I’m muddling through my days right now friends. Intense, sudden trauma can wreck havoc on your body and mind weeks and months after the jolting of its turbulence has passed. It certainly has mine. I’m relieved but restless. I thankful but tired. I mingle with grief and walk with gratitude. If you have never occupied such a space, you may not understand, but it is a cumbersome place to fall. I find myself wondering when I will feel adequate again? When will I not feel like I’m letting everyone and everything in my home, and around me down?

Then I’m reminded, that is an arrogant, self sufficient line of interrogation. There will never be a time I will not be neglecting someone or something. In those moments when I forget, I am consumed by frustration. Rest, peace and growth become good desires I am chasing in vain.

I have been feeling very insufficient since Carter’s accident. I am very forgetful. My memory has abandoned me. I do hope it’s on a beach somewhere planning a return soon. If not, I hope it comes back to get the rest of me-:). I’m going to need to shop soon for new clothes, sheets, towels, etc…if the laundry continues to not do itself. My pantry and refrigerator scare me. Every time I open them, they rebuke me. Really, it goes something like this, “we need eggs, ice cream, milk, bread, and just when exactly do you plan on getting to the store?”

With Carter in school such short days, and so many appointments, I am finding it hard to manage my time and responsibilities. When I get a few moments, the to do list is longer than my ability to perform, and sturdier than my stamina. The last few days I have been feeling particularly inferior to my sub par performance- Until yesterday morning.

During a Bible study, Unhitching from the Crazy Train, Julie Sparkman of @Restore Ministries, said this, “we are inadequate and unashamed- that equals the Gospel. That gem of truth was a life giving reminder on a flesh flourishing day for me. It was like a refreshing drink of water on a scorching August afternoon. I knew, but I had forgotten. I had forgotten, and thus forsaken the Gospel.

Jesus died for my inadequacies, and yours. Being ashamed of them is being dishonorable to Him. He willingly gave his life to give me life. He suffered a cruel, undeserved death to complete me in all the areas I am incomplete. Because He is whole, I am free to be broken. Because he is perfect, I am free to be imperfect. That is good news for a ragamuffin like me.There is no need to twinge in light of my truth. There is no need to cower to condemnation. I am righteous because Jesus is risen.

Life has its way of coaxing us into forgetting, but the Gospel has its way of coaching us into remembering.

C. S. Lewis said, “people need reminding a lot more than they need instructing.” Those words are bearers of solid truth. I know, and I forget. I am reminded, and I am set free.

Our years are a series of stages and phases. I am grateful for the ones in which my insufficiency is illuminated so my mind and spirit can once again yield to the exclusion of the One who secures for me all that I cannot attain on my own. I need the Gospel in my hands everyday, so that my heart may remember everyday. I am continually drawn to an awareness that growth is most fertile when planted in the soil of grief. Staying cognizant of that is a bridge to hope and gratitude.

I hope in all the areas you feel inadequate today, and everyday you can find some freedom from this, as I did.

Loving Well

- dannalundstrom

474551ec5327ce3fd6e7eb355b255669

I am reminded everyday of the pervasiveness of pain and suffering all around me. Suffering holds no prejudices and knows no boundaries. It is not indigenous to one gender, ethnicity or socioeconomic class. Sadness, tears, fear ridden faces, weary eyes…these are not exclusively the expressions of hurting people.

Outer adornments can mask much inner adversity. Sometimes our culture, our standing and our position in society can be chains that shackle us in shame to pain and trials that make days lonely, long and weary. Let us not be fooled by false embellishments that serve to mask pain, but may we all seek to see through the wallpapered exteriors of those around us to the true state of hearts that desperately need to be recognized and known.

I think it’s easy to fall into the faulty line of thinking that because someone appears to “have it all, ” they need nothing.  The things that sometimes look like “happiness,” a nice house, nice car, beautiful family… are the fallible things of this world that lure people into security, but serve as little protection from the realities of this life.

May we seek deep interest and intention in every eye we look into this day and each day forward. Intention to not only see what is visible, but to sense what is invisible. We are called to love people. Love commands knowing people, and growing people. That encompasses much more than asking, “How are you?” I am guilty of asking this question in passing with the intent of getting the packaged, well rehearsed and convenient answer, “I’m fine.”

Being an intentional friend, and loving people well is not efficient . If we are not getting messy with people, we are not knowing people. May we all be good stewards of people’s suffering.

Daily Prayer

- dannalundstrom

fc84fcd352a2181de383c6e5ed1accc8

ISIS, Ebola, Enterovirus, missing airliners, mystery stomach bug…Lord each day we wake to new seeds of fear being planted by news outlets, and subsequently spread through social media. These worries and concerns become fertilizers for growth of fear in our concerned and protective hearts. Assist us in finding that healthy space of being informed but not infiltrated, because this world is too heavy for us, but not for you. When we allow information to become infatuation, remind us Father that it is rooted in an unbelief of your sovereignty. You are surprised by nothing, and never caught off guard. Give us the grace to place our world and loved ones in your capable hands, and not our controlling ones. I ask that you continue to gaze upon our country, other countries and all those we love with merciful eyes. May we all be missionaries of peace graced with the message of faith in the midst of so much worldly fear.