Tag: anxiety

The Real Trinity

- dannalundstrom

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What trinity are you operating under today?

I opened one of my books this morning and read this: In nothing be anxious. ~Philippians 4:6
That is a tall order for me most days. In really difficult and threatening situations, it is much easier to be a victim than a victor. It is common to profess to live under the Trinity, Father, Son, and Holy Spirit. However, in the refining heat of life’s challenges it is effortless to become a casualty of the wrong trinity; fear, anxiety and worry.

What is easier can insidiously become a place of comfort. When getting honest, the wrong trinity can mascarade as a self-southing blanket of safety. This is one of the enemy’s biggest lies. He wants you and me operating under the wrong authority.

Walking in the shadow of Father, Son and Holy Spirit as our compass is not the effortless way, but it is the effective way. We are not called members of God’s army metaphorically; but literally because we are in a battle with the forces that are always preying on our hearts.

As 1 Corinthians 16:13 says, we must always be on alert; standing firm with strength and courage in our faith. May we all pray for sufficient grace to live that command every day, because we cannot do it out of our strength.

Be encouraged friends, the presence of fear, anxiety and worry does not mean we have no faith; it means because of the fall we need faith.

Twice or thrice a day, look to see if your heart is not disquieted about something; and if you find that it is, take care forthwith to restore it to calm. ~Francis De Sales

We Must Live As We Believe

- dannalundstrom

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At the root of anxiety, fear, worry and discouragement is always the seed of unbelief. When I find myself fraternizing with any of the above, as I often do, I have to ask which of God’s promises I am not living? Self-examination is liberating and crucial to soul stability.

Still a Child

- dannalundstrom

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I have to be honest; there are days I find myself wishing I was not an adult.   Today is the perfect example.   I have a meeting that I am not looking forward to handling.   It is a continuously challenging situation that chides and chisels away at the depth of my joy if I am not attentive to it.

Like many days, I am fighting to choose the beauty of perspective.   Perspective is a priceless art.   It tells me that if this is the most difficult thing I encounter today, it will still be a pretty good day.

The reality of life is that some days responsibilities are heavy, and difficult situations arise that we have to navigate.   I catch myself thinking, how wonderful to be the child again and have an adult handle all the arduous assignments.   This morning God tenderly reminded me that I am still the child-His child.

As a believer, we never enter strenuous situations alone, and I am not called to figure it all out, just to rest and receive.   Whew is that hard! It seems illogical that rest should be so illusive, but we all know it to be, friends.   Maybe like me, you find resolving much easier than resting.

I am very forgetful to remember that I, like you, have a faithful and loving Father, who goes before and with us.   He enters into those anxious and scary places as the adult, and we like the child if we allow ourselves to abide in his authority.

I am so thankful for the truth in Exodus 33:14 this morning~ The Lord replies, “My presence will go with you, and I will give you rest.”   When I can not just read this, but also reap it, my day becomes so much lighter.   I shrivel to think where I would be without the soul stabilizers of God’s promises.

Whatever is confronting you today, tomorrow or next week, may you find the grace to concede as a child of God and find peace in His assured provisions.

The Christmas Gift That Almost Unwrapped Me

- dannalundstrom

 

In late November my husband told me he wanted to give our daughter a father/daughter week this summer at JH Ranch for Christmas.   That idea immediately sounded all the alarm buttons inside me, fear, anxiety, worry…

I love JH Ranch, their philosophy, the people and Who and what they represent.   Their programs are top notch and life changing, but I am still recovering from almost loosing our son last July in an accident while he was at camp there.   How could I agree to this? How could I even entertain the idea?   Was he crazy?   All these questions were brewing a chaotic storm in my heart and mind.

As quickly as that storm was surging, something else was surfacing.   Not something but Someone.   God’s truth began gently, quietly and consistently streaming in my head.   God does not call us to a life of fear.   2 Timothy 1:7~For God has not given us a spirit of fear and timidity, but of power, love, and self-discipline.   I was not wanting to hear that in my moment of melting.   I wanted to be fearful-very fearful! In this circumstance, fear seemed like a much safer choice.   However, I know this about God; he does not leave his children stuck in known places of “safety” He leads us to unknown positions of surrender.

It took me some time to be at peace with the decision to give our daughter that Christmas gift.   I did not want to, but I knew I was being called to.   Obedience to God’s will is seldom easy.   It often grieves us but always grows us.   It challenges us, and it chisels us into His image.   2 Timothy 3:16~All Scripture is breathed out by God and profitable for teaching, for reproof, for correction, and for training in righteousness.

When we step into the shadow of death with a loved one, feel its sting and breathe its stale, suffocating air, we are changed.   When you almost lose something, you love so much, resisting the urge to fall into the alluring trap of putting ourselves in charge of the safety and protection of those we hold so dear is challenging!

Based on God’s word, though,  all indicators tell me He did not spare my son’s life for me to become my children’s savior.   He did not spare his life for me to grab on tighter and smother them in a bubble of supposed safety.   God did not spare my son’s life for me to turn my children into idols shaped in my image.   He spared my son’s life for His purpose, not my power.

Shortly after Christmas, friends and family began asking our children about their gifts.   Our daughter was asked, more than once, “what was your favorite gift?”   Each time she answered, “camp with my dad at JH Ranch next summer.   As people asked the question, I began to experience my body stiffening and my eyes squinting as if something was about to hit me.   It was!   I was “hit” with looks that if they could talk might say, “are you crazy!”   I received comments that resulted in shame.   I felt like an irresponsible mother for a short time, and it taxed the depth of peace that encompassed my decision.   I had to remember that walking in obedience is a process of frequent renewal to a life guided by Spirit, not self.

Initially, I felt the need to explain the gift to all the puzzled people.   My explaining something that is right between God and me, however, is only an attempt to tidy myself up to satisfy my need to meet the approval of people.   Explaining can become a form of self-righteousness.   I am grateful for the words in the Gospel of Matthew that release me from my need to explain.   Matthew 5:37 says, Simply let your ‘Yes’ be ‘Yes,’ and your ‘No,’ ‘No’; anything beyond this comes from the evil one.     I am only accountable to One.  Sometimes what is right between God and me makes no sense to outside parties, but their understanding is not my responsibility.    I love the freedom in that!

After all the gift giving, a gift to my daughter that almost unwrapped me proved to be a gift for me, too.     It rewrapped me in the freedom; rest and comfort of a sovereign God who I am so grateful pursues me even through Christmas gifts.   Never has giving a Christmas gift been so laden with pain and so loaded with purpose.   Growth happens in grievous places.   That is good news, friends!

An Unbelieving Believer

- dannalundstrom 1 Comment

Life is about enjoying, but as Christians, more than we are comfortable admitting, it is often more about enduring…enduring the diagnosis, enduring the loss of a job, broken relationships, the addiction, the absence of a prodigal child or spouse who likely may never return home. Life is about enduring the daily news, which everyday seems to stir anxiety and summon fear. It’s about enduring the loss of a parent, a sibling and even a child.  The unthinkable, the horrific, the unfair, none of these are strangers to this life we inhabit, and all of them are cloaked around someone who often does not deserve such pain.

Jesus did not deserve such pain. 

Pain is not partial in this life, but perseverance is.  Perseverance is reserved only for those who are fueled by a joy that cannot be bought or manufactured, but given by a relationship with a God who is the only one that can sustain us through extinguishable trials.

This life is full of moments that bring us joy, but equally those that challenge the depth of our faith in a God whose perceived silence feels deafening in the darkest of circumstances.  It is those circumstances, the dark ones, the ones that threaten our identity as a believer, and reveal the fundamental theology that we are living off of.  Sometimes this revelation is not what we would expect, especially to “believers.”

“You are an unbelieving believer.”

These painful, piercing words were spoken to define  me three years ago, by someone who had my best interest at heart.  Like a ball of fire that wold burn my soul, they seared me to my core.  It made me mad, it made me cry, and for a short time, I did not like her. I did not like her until I realized she was absolutely right!

I was going through a hard time.  I was stumbling, struggling and sometimes stalling life down a very unstable road.  Worry, anxiety and fear were my friends.   They were the trinity that were ruling my life. I was an unbelieving believer, because I was not living off of the truths of the gospel.  I was living off of the fears of an opportunistic, fallen world that can easily overtake those who are not deeply anchored to the rock of life-Jesus.

If we believe God is sovereign, if we believe He works all things for the good, if we believe He will not abandon us…how is there room for excessive worry, anxiety and fear in our lives?  There was in mine three years ago, because saying you believe and even thinking you believe are not the same as living as you believe.

Belief is a very active, ongoing, moment to moment renewal to fight to live that which we say we know. It is not enough to know, we have to fight to really know.  It is not enough to hear, we have to fully engage to really hear.  It is not even enough to see, we have to seek to really see for ourselves, otherwise, how can we really believe?

It is not that we should strive to go through this life worry free, anxiety free and fear free.  That is not possible, I know!  The goal is to live this life reflecting the goodness, faithfulness and character of a God who is carrying us well through all those difficult times.

We are allowed to be afraid, Jesus was afraid to the point of what was described in Luke as sweating blood.  We are allowed to have worry and anxiety, but none of these things will have us if God completely has our hearts, our minds and our beliefs surrendered and anchored to  His promises.

A life of surrender looks a lot different, and it feels a lot different.  It feels light and free and it looks not always smooth, but definitely safe.

May we all fight the good fight of belief, even when it makes no sense.  May we fight to believe when we don’t want to, and worry and fear seem like a more appealing choice.  May we fight hardest when God seems quietest. May we all remember that although HE sometimes is seemingly silent, HE is never still. You never endure alone. Spend a little time with Jesus today and allow him to engage you in your endurance.  He will give you rest.